I've moved!

NEW BLOG

I am kinda published! Sorta...

Hello again Interwebs, Its me here... And I have some exciting news for you! I wrote a piece for a local newspaper's "Pulse" page (a page for young writers/artists/poets to show off DEM SKILLZ!) and mine got in! WOOT WOOT. SO here it is, some things i had to tweak from the original because to put in bluntly, the sucked. I was also forced into writing some parts in it that me, as a free-spirited comedic writer, am not happy with. So yeah... If you want me to post the original, I can.. Just somebody for the love of all Jeebuses POST A DARN COMMENT!

ALSO, they totally spelled my last name wrong... :/

How to (not) be a water girl

A report of Golden Boot Rugby tournament from the world’s worst water girl

Alicia Moores, Grade 11

At McMaster University, an equally-confused friend and I stepped out of Rosie, the 1996 Nissan rust bucket my mum drives, and set out to find this magical “Field behind the Stadium” – the promised land. Luckily, I had a scarf to protect my sensitive skin from the razor-like wind.

Yellow socks on the horizon: the distinct trait of an Ancaster Royals rugby girl. We went over and helped set up camp. Soon enough, the yellow stockings multiplied and we had a whole team of fierce looking girls ready to kick some booty.

I was the newly appointed water girl for Ancaster High girls’ rugby. My (already genetically bad) knee had been rugby-practice injured the week before.

Leading up to the Consolation game at 2:30, I watched our loyal Royals do jumping jacks and a passing drill in which you practice passing the ball with two hands on the ball at all times (except for when throwing it) and get in the rhythm of keeping the ball close to you like it’s your newborn baby.

With the thrill of a recent victory still burning through their veins, the girls then began the pre- game psych-up.

I watched the socks organize themselves in a lopsided circle with arms reaching around each other, then scream “1, 2, 3 ROYALS!!”  Compared to the complex cheers of other teams, ours looks juvenile.  We need a new, more intimidating cheer like this one school also at the Golden Boot Rugby Tournament .  They start quiet and progressively get louder  -- “go, go, go, Go, Go, GO, GO, GO” -- and make the other teams feel like peeing.  

As the game began, the yellow socks set themselves up in an exploded scrum.   A scrum is one horde of girls pushing up against another horde of girls. 

Chaos. Organized, painful chaos is what rugby looks like to the untrained eye. Girls flying this way and that, hard hits, one million and ten scrums and the coaches screaming “RUCK OVER!  GET HER! GO GO GO!” I saw one of the mothers with her brows furrowed and her hands twining through her hair. I abandoned my water girl post to go help a sister out. The mother was watching her daughter get pummelled.  I took it upon myself to assure this worried momma that her cub was fine and that she didn’t feel all the hits, the adrenaline was too strong.

Halftime – my time to shine!  I’m thinking to myself “I got this,” when really, I don’t because, it’s me and I’m bound to mess something or other up.  I get up and my aforementioned bum knee (stubborn like the rest of me) locks in place and I stumble and then I just trudge over to the happy group of yellow socks… forgetting the water bottles completely.

At the game’s end, my failed water girl attempts were all forgotten and all the yellow socks were tired and turf-burned and very bruised but the faces of the girls wearing the still-up-high-and-proud socks had huge, silly grins on them.   We won 2-1.

MIM.

I HAVE A BOOGIE! I HAVE A BOOGIE! I HAVE A BOOOOGIE!!

ON MY PLATE!

MOOOOM, BLAKE…! IS SITTING ON MY FACE…! WITH A…! PILLOW! OW! STOP IT! 

MOOOOOOM!

MOM, WHERE’S THE SOCK BAG!?!

These are just some of the complaints I’ve had and you have attended to every single one of them and more, so I wanted to say first off… Thanks J

I never get you anything for Mother’s day and I’m pretty sure you have enough macaroni necklaces and bookmarks to last you a century. So, this year I decided to write a blog post showing how cool of a mum you are (the term cool is used very  loosely.. you are still not “hip” or “current” no matter how many times you shout TWINNING and ACO TACO… *which both stopped being cool a while ago. Not that I would know, as I am no cooler than you.*)

You are NOT a traditional mum. You don’t hide anything from us (unless you stole $5 from me... because I keep my money “too out in the open”… My room, on a shelf, behind a Kleenex box, safely tucked away inside my wallet.) Which is pretty cool I guess. Also, when Blake comes home with countless pink slips you’re cool with it because you know hes a dinkwad and I know hes a dinkwad, the school system just hasn’t figured it out yet.

The endearing terms of “whore” and “slut” that shower me with love and respect every morning... I really should have less self-confidence than I have (which, by the way, Blake insists is a “me” problem).

The TURN UP Friday nights we have, when B has a social life (social life… pfft… who needs friends when you’ve got food and internet). The party-party fun nights that entail you watching some obscure history program and me watching Minecraft  videos on YouTube and smiling stupidly into the screen (again, no social life). The nights when we turn the coffee table so that it reaches both couches to hold some delectable confection of milk-free euphoria you have baked most recently. Those are the best.

There was this one time that I am remembering now, a really long time ago, we were having one of the aforementioned “turn up Fridays” and you were slightly over tired so, naturally, you were giddy and kind of “spacey” so you threatened that when I got a boyfriend, and I brought him home, you would run around the house screaming “where’s waldo?” in your blue-striped housecoat. This, is why it took me forever to let you meet “Joe”.

My holy grail, going out for sushi without B and trying to figure out the menu, eventually resorting to asking the waiter how to pronounce Edamame.

PUSHEEN. The way we can communicate over Facebook is amazing. All that is needed to communicate emotion is to simply send an adorable Pusheen. Then after the initial shock of the cuteness we can decipher it.

What else?

Well, you let me get a tattoo, so that makes you superdy dooperdy cool. You know what would make you even better? Letting me get another...?

You help me with my writing and encourage me (after you’re done making fun of me).

*people of the internet, my mum really is awesome, it’s just my family is… well... Special? 

And we have different ideas of how we show affection (teasing)*

Ok, so you always point guys out in stores, as most mums do. But then you whisper to me “he was totally checking you out” when he was actually just looking at the pretty girl behind me wearing no clothing. Not me. Guys don’t look at me. Just trust me on this one. Or, he was checking out the iceberg lettuce on sale behind me, thinking “why won’t those weirdos move so I can get me some iceberg lettuce!?!” you don’t want to deny growing boys their tasty, green Iceberg lettuce do you? No? Then stop pointing them out so we both can move on with our lives. Thank you, Sincerely, ME and all dem boyz who like themselves a nice hunk of Iceberg lettuce.

No clue where the second half of that came from…

I AM STILL MAD AT YOU FOR NOT SAVING YOUR PROM DRESS. Enough said.

Apparently I got my whore-like dancing tendencies from you so that’s great :/

CHEESY COUPONS

1) Okay no.

2) "Sadly", you do not get these ones, you get “special” ones.

..Excuse the size, technical difficulties:)

AND lastly, since I am an amazing daughter, I think you should let me get my Peacock feather tattoo earlier than discussed :)

LOVE YOU MIM!

The Library.

Okay so, I am currently sitting in the library and I feel obligated to at least seem to be doing something useful. This, is my useful.

It is currently 12:56 and the library is only filled with old people and scholarly college/university peeps. And then there's me, the random high-school-er (?) who is just sitting there with her tattoo, combat boots and ridiculously loud keyboard. Seriously could I get any more awkward?

The reason of which I am at this library, destroying people's silence is because I just got braces  (Invisalign) on across the street. 

Back to me being the most disruptive ever, Everyone here looks so focused and smart, meanwhile there is me, looking like a high school dropout writing to nobody on her blog.

Yup, that's me!

My laptop sounds like it is going to blast off into space, the fan is so loud on this ol' triceratops.

Also, there is this older lady beside me who keeps sighing and mumbling to herself, she looks to be in her late 40s - early 50s, wearing a navy blue sweater, a particularily colorful neck scarf tie thingy and her blonde hair is covering her face from my vantage point, making me unable to tell her true age. She is signing again, apparently this later-in-life schooling thing is very stressful... Now she sits, contemplating life whilst staring into her computer. Me and my curiosity want to know what shes doing!!!!!  She appears to be signing up for a lecture at a college? Or maybe shes applying to college...? Little late-in-life schooling happening here? Who knows. 

*clickity click click click clickkkk* 

that is what i sound like right now..

OOOH BISH PLEASE, ITS NOT MY FAULT I HAVE A DINOSAUR FOR A COMPUTER!! (stressed blue sweater lady just glared at me a mighty glare.)

I've realized that the small town I live in is extremely trusting of others. Maybe too trusting. Some guy just.. left... his MacBook on the table just there waiting to be stolen, Except it wont, because there is no criminals in a public library of a small town at 1:00 in the afternoon. He left and has yet to come back. *Did he get abducted? CONSPIRACY!!* This leaving-of-the-MacBook would never ever never no happen in a city like Toronto.... Someone wouldn't leave tenir muffin unattended, let alone a 1000+ dollar laptop. *sigh.. small town probs*

Oh look he came back! And guess where he went. Timmys. To get a coffee, how very Canadian of you sir. 

I want sushi.

God, my teeth hurt. 

Ow.

Okay, we are going to end this before it gets much worse than it already is.

(My laptop)

No, It did not hurt.

Hello interwebs... Me again. 

So today I was a badass and decided to get a tattoo. (No, this was not an impulse decision, no need to worry... I have been planning this for months) 

My tattoo is a Celtic (pronounced sell-tik) knot, which basically is a giant, fancy infinity symbol. It is all one continuous line and it represents basically what an infinity symbol does. It means, like, forever and continuity. KEEP GOING really, or that's what it means to me...

To answer the most asked question, and to explain the title, NO it did not hurt. It was like someone with the self restraint for NOT biting their nails incessantly (long nails) dragging them on the area you are getting tattooed. Not a big deal really. Honestly, the dentist is worse. 

So yeah, I got a tattoo and i love it! 

I got it from this really talented guy named Roger and he's really awesome and I would highly recommend him! 

https://www.facebook.com/pages/Lords-Ink-Canada/233836682474?fref=ts 
           ^^^^
His Facebook Page

and yeah, it took about an hour, it was $140 and if you have any more questions... put them in the comments! (I'm looking at you... on person who reads these things)

It.

Me looking dorky.

It getting done.. FACE OF STEEL.

I am a big old crippled, smelly, tomato at the moment.

This is a problem and I feel like some complaining so, as always, I am going to tell one person on the Internet about it.  

Hey bruh.

So. How has your life been? Mine could be better but it's also not horrid.

THE HORRID PARTS: 

First order of business is the fact that I play rugby, and I am so bad at it that sometimes it's comical. So I've decided to complain about what happened there first (and also clarify the "cripple" part in the title). I was practicing like normal, not really having a clue what was going on and doing a drill I've done 1000 times it feels like. So I started with the ball and was supposed to try and avoid my teammates who were going to try and tackle me.. Well, I started running, and running, and I was doing well if I say so myself. But then i got tackled by this teeny little girl. She fell on me with all her weight on my knee which was very exposed and very unsupported and just genetically bad too so, naturally with my luck  it got very painfully injured (It felt like it was popping out of its socket.) So that hurt. 

It's still weak and I can't really do much of anything let alone play again. So I'm kinda pissed that me and my "entertaining" (clueless) playing is not to be showcased for at least half the season. 

WOOT freaking HOOT 

Second order of business is the "tomato" explanation 

Well, I am a redhead, so therefore I have sensitive and fair skin that reacts to everything because why would any part of me be easy to take care of? 

And so I was WATCHING (still injured) my AWESOME team play some kick-ass rugby all day an it was soooo windy. It felt like little icicles pelting my skin at points. I admire them for only having shorts and a t shirt jersey. Looked so cold! Meanwhile I was on the sidelines like a wimp in pants, a coat and a big scarf... Still freezing.  In April. #canadaproblems

And the smelly is just that I probably should have a shower because my hair smells like wind and pizza for some reason.

THE GOOD PARTS: 

1. I AM GETTING A TATTOO. 

Yes, a real life tattoo and I'm so insanely excited and terrified all at the same time. 

(I'll do a more in depth post after I get it... On Saturday)

2. My best friend got herself a boyfriend and I'm so happy for her because this one isn't a 100% jerk for once! YOU GO GIRL.

* Wow, I just realized that you, my one amazing reader is going to start this and be like... NOPE this chick has got WAAAY too many problems.! Run. But if you're reading this thanks for staying. *

OH THAT FEELS GOOD

*insert dirty minded thought here*

Get your mind out of the gutter, one, lonely viewer (I need to make up a more interesting name for you..) as I am not saying that in a dirty way... It just feels nice to complain about everything and then post it on the Internet for wveryone to see and read and judge..? 

Wait. Why do I do this again?

Okay....

Sorry this isn't very funny, I'm just not in a super funny mood. 

Bye :) 

*Disclaimer*

Hello blog readers of the internet, I am about to put up a whole bunch of "school-related" posts (6 or 7 to be exact) and they are quite different to my normal, insane, choppy writing style so don't panic, I am not changing or going through a mid- teenage life crisis or something... It's just a school project.

Nobody cares as, yet again, I am writing to nobody.

Great.

*New disclaimer - I took all the posts down because they were annoying me and the aesthetic of my blog. trying to keep it professional here (LOL)*

Yesterday.

Hey blogosphere.

*I am pretty sure I'm like the only person who actually says "blogosphere"*

So as you may think from the serious title of "Yesterday" (WITH A .) that something else depressing or sad happened to me yesterday and I'm about to blabber on about how nobody understands me and I'm going to be alone forever and just basically how life sucks. Well, let me tell you, that is a very wrong assumption.

Yesterday, (April 2nd 2015) was one of the best days I've had in a while.

It started out as a pretty normal morning, I got up, and then climbed back into my bed, snuggled for a while, and then actually got up. I got dressed and then the day of wonderful unicorn happiness commenced with me looking F.I.E.R.C.E (Admittedly, I did look "hoe"-like (as my mother and brother both manage to point out)).

It was while I was in the car that I remembered that I was FINALLY going for my braces appointment that day. I was at last going to be on my way to straight teeth. I had been waiting patiently for braces ever since grade 6, but alas, I am now in grade 11. #divorcedparentprobs.

Anyway, I did all that stuff and they took molds of my stupid teeth (Which, on the top resemble a cliff and sometimes I imagine that little people walk to their unfortunate deaths when they go a little too far and prance right off the edge of my teeth-cliff. Poor imaginary tiny people)

Well, that was random.

Okay back on track. After the Orthodontist, I got dropped back at school where, I had missed my “harder” class (English 3U) and now just had Art. In art I did almost nothing, because I had finished my Mythical creature assignment (It’s a two-headed dragon, I will attach a picture) and brought it down to the “Big” art room to be fired.

Art ended and in a surge if newfound confidence I decided I was going to eat lunch with this cute boy I have had a crush on for a while now. He sits alone and I felt bad (also, cute) so I decided I would bless him with my presence. My insane, loud, socially awkward self. I think I may have scared him because he’s really shy and quiet and I’m well… Not. We did talk all lunch hour, and I learned a lot about him, and yeah he’s real cute (Dimples = YES.) So that was the second ball of amazingness that happened to me yesterday.

After lunch, I just had SAP (Intro to Sociology, Anthropology and Psychology) and we were in the computer lab, so naturally my friends and I went on Webkinz and Polly Pocket and TVO kids and played children’s games all period long, reliving fond memories from the “good ol’ days”.  *Webkinz has sooooo many ads now it’s insane*

Then was the “buyout”. A buyout, for those who don’t know, is when something is happening at my school (Football games, Basketball games... etc.) and you (the student) brings in money (usually 2-5 dollars) and you quite literally BUY OUT of class. I got to miss Math for this buyout which I was pretty freaking happy about.

Another wonderful thing that happened yesterday was RUGBY practice (btw.. “Lunch guy” used to play rugby.. YES again) and at rugby practice, I got lifted into the air. It was terrifying and so fun all at the same time! You may be wondering… Why? Why did you get lifted into the air? Well, my friend, It was part of something called a Line-out, which, in rugby, is when the ball goes out of bounds and this is how we get it back in.

Lastly, I DRIVEDED  yesterday. I, actually drove a piece of machinery (my dad's escape) and I did not kill anybody! WOOT WOOT go me! I just went around in squares and I actually pressed the gas. 

And yeah, that is the recount of my amaaaaazing day! I never know how to end these things.

Well, bye!

P.S. For those people *coughs* *Mum* who were annoyed at how short my posts were, this one consists of 668 words so HA!

Links for Children's Websites Mentioned:

Webkinz

Polly Pocket

TVO kids

Literally me.

"My life is like Friends, except no Rachel, Ross, Monica, Phoebe or Joey, just Chandler in a room by himself laughing at his own jokes."

I am Chandler, Chandler is me, we are one. 

I love the television show Friends, and i was surfing the web and saw this, it was just too funny to not post!

Also, soon there will be a giant post, It is a school project, don't be alarmed. I will go into more detail on the actual post.

Well, this is awkward.

What am I doing with my life?

Nobody cares.

Okay gonna go now before this gets any more philosophical and deep.

OH MY GOSH.

Okay so we all know this blog is not poular by any definition, BUT, for the first time ever "WE" have broken 100 views of this blog in one day.. YAAAAAS!!!! I'm so happy right now it's kinda pathetic.

THANK YOU RANDOM PEOPLE WHO READ MY COMPLAINTS ON THE INTERNET :)

I am so thankful for the fact that all of your lives are so boring you have the time and energy to read my posts. So, thanks.

*really random post*

*a lot of use of the word Thanks*

*sorry*

*eep*

Might as well just shun me now.

Hello blogosphere, It's me again, and this post is slightly overdue but I have just been "busy" (extremely lazy) so I have not written anything.

Well, you're probably wondering about the title and thinking "No! we would never shun you we love you!" Who am I kidding, nobody is saying that. I'm typing to myself as usual.

I DYED MY HAIR

Well, sort of.

I dyed the tips of my gorgeous red locks black. So far no elderly people have shunned me for my sins, but its only been a week. 

So yes, my minions, I have become rebellious and cool. Bow down to me :)

I also started wearing mascara, It's been a week and I'm already done with the whole not-being-able-to-rub-your-eyes-thing. So done.

This all happened while my best friend was in Cuba, soaking up the sun, without me, not even worrying that I may do something drastic like pretty much do anything I've ever said I wouldn't do. Boy, was she surprised. I posted a picture (a SELFIE, nonetheless) of my hair and when she got back she saw it and freaked out. Then, at school the following day, I walked in and she caught sight of me, her rebellious best friend, and barreled down the hallway towards me and my other friend Zara hid behind me because a barreling Marlee is a dangerous Marlee. She crashed into me and immediately started screaming and analyzing every new thing about me. In front of everybody, In the crowded hallway, It was great.

Anyway, that's that.

Hopefully you guys (one person who actually reads this thing... I know that you're out there) enjoyed this little rant thingmadoodle. 

'tis a picture of my beautiful monkey face

Point Proof Explanation Paragraphs

I consider myself a human being, a creative one at that. 

I do not like structure, I feel it dampens my naturally creative spirit.  

This, is why I, as a human (as opposed to a rule-following robot only concerned with grades), do not like the "Point-Proof-Explanation" paragraph style. 

In this dead fish of writing structure, you do not actually need a single brain cell to write it. It follows a very specif pattern of: 
1) telling the "Point" you will be arguing in your paragraph.
2) finding "Proof" (usually in the form of a quotation from a text you were forced to read.) and properly citing it (Mooers 17). 
3) In an essay, the "Explanation" part is where you explain how your  "Point" relates to your thesis, stated in your equally dead and equally fish-smelling introduction paragraph.

I constantly voice my strong distaste for these paragraphs, including on multiple occasions, arguing with my English and history teachers to let me write MY WAY. I never win. So, my creative mind is forced to think scientifically and logically (for anybody who knows me, you know that I am not a logical person). 

Anyway, That's it.. Unless I find something else to complain about today.

How to identify a hipster.

As I was walking down the city streets of downtown Toronto, my eccentric mother asks "what is a hipster?" I laugh, and reply "dearest mother, a hipster is an individual who tries to be different and refuses to "conform" or fit into a group of people. While that is not a true assumption. They fall into a group all their own, The Hipsters."

HOW TO IDENTIFY A HIPSTER.

I. "The Look"

Hipsters can be seen wearing the following: 

• beanies 
• doc martens
• OODLES OF PLAID
• ripped jeans or rolled up chinos
• mustaches and beards are popular for the men
• other utilitarian boots
• strange flat shoes that i do not know the name of
• "douche" haircut (shaved sides, floppy bit on top)
• MORE PLAID
• unkempt appearance, "just-got-out-of-bed-and-I'm-homeless-chic"
• skinny jeans for men, baggy "mom jeans" complete with pleats for women
• hoodies, probably american apparel.
• HIPSTER GLASSES (glasses with thick frames and a sort of block-y, geometric appearance)
• cigarettes (all.the.time)
• messenger bag filled with records of random indie bands, more cigarettes, some sort of apple device, something vintage probably, money (it is still unclear as to where hipsters get money from), journal (full of brooding thoughts and comics depicting corporate greed), a couple pens.
• tattoos 
• often carrying some sort of local Starbucks spin-off drink.
• constantly wearing hats
• scarves they knitted themselves

II. "Where to Spot a wild Hipster in it's natural Habitat"

Hipsters are typically seen in one of 3 places:

1. Concerts, of Indie bands that *shhh* don't actually exist
2. Aforementioned "Starbucks spin-offs" and other coffee-house-like I.N.D.E.P.E.N.D.A.N.T food eatery.
3. In their equally hipster-ized lofts, complete with wooden rafters and all the vintage doohickeys you can imagine!

III. "The Rules"

There are very strict hipster rules, to be in this group that has formed out of people who claim to be independent and refuse to "conform" to someone else's ideas... Hmmm... Makes perfect sense *she types with some sarcastic sass*.

• DO NOT be happy that you're favorite "band" (they actually don't exist) won... anything. No record contracts. no recognition, no nothing. You just want them to be eternally struggling and practicing in their garages.
• DO NOT CONFORM
• HATE MAJOR CORPORATIONS... except for apple, apple is life.
• DO NOT shower... ever... seriously. (If you do happen to get clean somehow, go outside and roll in a mud puddle, to achieve that "authentic" look.
• ALWAYS drink obscure alcohol brands that may or may not have WHMIS labels on them... :/
• PENCILS ARE MAINSTREAM. pens, however are widely accepted among the hipster community, because of their obvious individuality.
• RECYCLE, SAVE THE PLANET always.
• IF YOU OWN a car, you are contributing to the major oil companies success, instead, the hipsters suggest you ride a USED bike, yes, even in the winter. Have fun.
• ALWAYS have records and a record player (because.. vintage), even though you're obscure "bands" don't make records, and you actually listen to their music on your BRAND NEW TOTALLY NOT MAINSTREAM IPHONE 6+.
• IF you are a man, you must have a mustache and a massive beard.
• GET (or make) a journal, to write all your brooding hipster thoughts in.
• DO NOT take your hat off indoors 
• In your "hipster home" you must have at least an entire forest's equivalent of exposed wood throughout home.
• NEVER look happy, if you smile, you will be shunned from the hipster community.
• as part of your initiation into the hipster community, you will be required to knit a scarf.
• THRIFT STORES ARE LIFE

And that, is an extensive guide to finding and identifying your very own hipster!

True Love.

Today, as most of you probably know is Valentine's Day. If you do not you most likely live under a rock. The pink and red and the hearts attack your face as soon as you go out into the world. It's impossible to miss. 

As it is Valentine's day today, and coming up on their 50th wedding anniversary, My grandparents celebrated in a "special" way. My grandfather isn't the most mentally "here" these days and normally thinks of nobody else but himself.  But, on this day he gave my Nana a SINGLE WRAPPED CANDY and a card that my nana thought was very sweet but as she read on she realized it, in fact wasn't a valentine's day card but an anniversary card. At least he tried… It's the thought that counts anyway.

I just thought this was kinda sweet for some reason and felt it was necessary to share.

Happy Valentine's Day people. 

I'm a very very bad little blog owner...

I completely forgot about the one year anniversary of my blog... You have full permission to attack me (please don't actually) because I suck at being a blog owner. I know I was supposed to post a blog a day, and I told you I tried... But alas, it did not happen. 

But i'm posting now so it'll all be okay.

Last year, I posted on how I hate Valentines Day and it sucks and i was a very bitter little 16 year old. 

Gonna do it again because I'm still bitter and I still don't like Valentines Day all that much.

VALENTINE'S DAY SUCKS FOR US SINGLE GIRLS. 

Being single sucks in general but Valentines day makes the fact exceptionally unbearable. It's the little things around Valentine's day that gets to me personally... Like when you go to the mall with your brother so he can get stuff for his girlfriend and be really sweet and stuff. Or, when you have been through a recent horrible heartbreak *cough cough Link* and you see a couple still together that got together around when you and "him" got together, making you remember that they made it and you didn't. Or just seeing any happy couple makes you want to sit in the corner behind a plant and hiss at passersby with cats surrounding you and ice cream dripping from the corner of your mouth.

You can be all "girl power" with your friends and everything but secretly you want to not be a dateless weirdo for the rest of your life and at least, have a fling, not a forever thing... but just a rush of intense passion taking over all your good senses and conscience.. a fling where you fall fast, have fun and end up with a broken heart.

Then, there's all the movies that come out around Valentine's Day and they just make you feel even worse. There's always (it never fails) a movie that comes out around valentines day about how the "cute, nerdy" girl gets with the "hot, mysterious" guy. *cough cough again Fifty Shades of Grey* (but.. that one has a lot of creepy sex stuff in it.. not the best example)

SO.. this Valentine's Day, I will be sitting alone in my bedroom, eating something (or an assortment of somethings), binge watching a yet-to-be-determined TV show on Netflix and/or YouTube. I will be doing this whilst texting my equally lonely BFF Marlee. 

AND if you are a guy and you like what you read on this ridiculousness, please find a way to contact me because trust me, I'm a very nice girl and im not really all that much work as far as Valentines go..

Hello...

I'm back. I once again was a bad Little blogger And have not posted. You May shun me now.

I have been binge watching Friends.  And now on season 10 episode 14 out of 10 seasons. I'm going to go into a deep withdrawal after it's over.

And I'm Just not feeling the writing thing today.

This is sad.

Hey! I got my stuff back from Link yesterday.  Exciting. And he just showed up on the doorstep with my cousin And her boyfriend. No warning.. Just poofed! It was like "bang he's back b**ch!" And I looked at him (big mistake) so as soon as I got my stuff back and they left I cried for like an hour *DANG HORMONES*

I HAVE Nothing LEFT to say to you people. .. or person. (More likely)

And sorry that's not a very funny post... but as I said not feeling it

I TOLD YOU PEOPLE I HAVE A FAN!!!

A REAL LIFE PERSON (AHS girl) LEFT A REAL LIFE COMMENT ON ONE OF MY POST HOLY COW PATTIES IM SO HAPPY RIGHT NOW!!! 

And I just wanted to say Thank you whoever you are, you have made me the happiest little blogger ever :) 

Theyre's a street laymp ryt theyre..

1) I am not illiterate, the title does have meaning and was supposed to be spelt that way. 

2) My mother and brother are cruel human beings. 

It is snowing in Canada right now (SHOCKER) and from my window I can see a street lamp, where the snowflakes show up in the light's path and I can therefore tell it it's still snowing.. Logical right?

Well, my family members think that it's H.I.L.A.R.I.O.U.S 

I was trying to share this knowledge of this street lamp to my brother and mother, and I said *apparently with a slight southern twang to my voice...* "there's a street lamp right there" but my horrid family members swear on their little shrivelled up hearts that I said "theyre's a street laymp ryt theyre" and now they won't stop repeating it.. :/ 

You try to pass on your knowledge and this is what you get... AHHH the hard life of a genius. 

...And here is a horrible picture (GO IPHONE 4!!) of the street lamp in question *it's the random dot in all the endless blackness* 

Heloo.. Please don't eat me :)

Hello Internet. Yes, I have been a bad little blog writer and have been slacking on the whole new-post-a-day thing. I told you I'd try :) BUT I'm here now so It's all going to be okay.

Hmm.. Well, I actually did something with my life on Friday.. Yes, surprising I know! 

I went to an extreme gathering of the nerds at a "Hobby Store" (not to be confused with a Comic Book Store however, as apparently they are two completely different things). 

I learned how to play the basics of an extremely confusing card game (that I still don't totally get) ... against my pair of Canadian Olympic mittens (just don;t ask), made a flower out of a receipt, and since I didn't understand half of the words they (the nerds) were saying.. I made sexual innuendos out of them (the words and phrases). In my head. While rethinking the direction of where my life was going as there was me, in a "Hobby Store" confused and bored out of my mind. 

This, sadly, was the most interesting thing I could have done with myself on a Friday night.

If you are wondering.. *which you weren't but I'm going to tell you anyway...* I was in this "Hobby Store" because I was meeting a guy. I wanted to meet him really bad so I agreed to come to this gathering of the geeks as I had nothing else to do. 

I felt like Penny from The Big Bang Theory. I sympathize with that character, as I know what its like to be surrounded by a gaggle of nerds. Always watching you like you're the last slice of pizza, or worse, a Limited Edition Mythical Rare foil card. (It's probably a thing...)

What else?

Well, today I went to my friends house to "Study" for our ART EXAM.. there was little to no studying actually going on though. Instead she (the friend) made a valiant effort to tech me to play Super Smash Bros. *The new one* and no matter how hard she tried to get me to understand, all of her efforts were futile. I continued to play using my go-to video game playing "strategy" (pressing random buttons which I do not know the function of and screaming).

Whilst I was talking to this ever-so-wise friend, I came upon the idea that I wanted to leave the safe realm of SIMS and go into uncharted waters to play a real game (the Legend of Zelda games). 

I had one small problem though. Me, the nice, humble, modest person i am gave my only gaming console (3DS) to my ex (Link) and now don't know how to ask for it back, as Link has blatantly ignored my requests before. 

AND its not just my 3DS i want back from him its my sweaters too.. yes, the "guy" (weenie with no balls... Link) took the "girl's" (my) sweaters. Meanwhile i got nothing of his. Hmmm... 

So, Link if you are being creepy and reading this, 1) %&*(*&?%$$?&**&?%$## you and 2) GIVE ME MY S**T BACK!! Love your amazing EX girlfriend, Alicia. :)

DAY FOUR

Well, I guess I have to write something for today.

If possible, could someone remind me why exactly I promised to write something every day as I do not know how I came up to this abhorrent idea and I'm kind of (really) regretting it now.

Sooooo...

Hey! So after two previous tries, I passed my G1 drivers (written) test! WOO HOO! I guess the old saying, "Third time's a charm" is true. Yes, it took me three tries to pass the supposedly easiest test in the history of life.

What else can I blabber on about?

Oh! I learned how to use the magical force of Skype last night, Its really not that complicated when you have a cute boy helping you through the maze of the many extents of the ever confusing Internet.

Skype still befuddles me though.

Hmmm...

I'm watching Glee right now, and yeah...

We are going to just end this now before it gets really bad :/

Random Cute Story.

This is just a random passage that I wrote and I think its cute and I'm lonely and yeah... So this happened.

When she walked through the door, her hair coppery hair escaping its bun he knew she had tried to create for hours, she walked towards him and as she saw him she smiled. He always said that her smile could end wars. The dress fit her body like it was made for her. He had never seen her look more beautiful in the 5 years they had been together.

He walked up to her and clasped those seemingly tiny hands in his. Then he ran his hands from hers, up her arms and to the sides of her face. He held her face for a while and just stared into her big, inquisitive, grey eyes. They asked "You going to kiss me or what?", he loved the way she teased him.

She stood on her tippy toes to reach his mouth and he bent over to meet hers. Then he kissed her. He moved his hands from the sides of her face down to her hips, as she folded her porcelain-skinned body into his, deepening the kiss.

Then their lips parted but she stayed folded into him. They stayed like this for a while. Then he put his lips to her ear and whispered "we really should get to dinner now". She smiled and said "okay". They slipped their hands together and walked into the restaurant.

Get out the Ben and Jerry's, start blaring some "women power" music, and does anybody have any tissues?

***I wrote this back right when Link broke up with me, so most of the missing him stuff is gone now and no longer relevant but for some reason I felt compelled to post it :)***

Breakups suck.

No doubt about it.

When anything ends, it sucks actually. So let me rephrase that, Endings suck. When something like a television series or a relationship ends (not on your terms) (wow. two totally different things) it feels like you are missing a part of yourself that you actually grew to like quite a bit. The happiness, the freedom, the feeling of someone being in your life because they WANT to be, not like your poor family, who are forced to like you. Then, when you have all the memories of the relationship… everywhere and you can't shake the feeling of the person, they're bursts of amazing energy are gone. Or, you can still feel the last time they kissed you, or the held your hand. You are constantly waiting for that text that makes your heart flutter, never to come from the same person again. Holy crud I'm depressing. Sorry.

But in my situation, no matter how much I want to hate him, (and trust me, I WANT to hate his guts) I can't find anything wrong with him still.

If you couldn't tell, I got dumped… well.. kind of…

THE STORY OF HOW I KINDA GOT DUMPED.. SORTA

It was a normal Wednesday night, me and Link had been fighting for a bit and I was basically just a huge ball of extreme emotions.

Fast forward to like 11 PM after not being able to sleep yet.

Me and Link decide to call each other and figure all this stuff out.

One reader, do you know that feeling when you know someone wants to break up with you, and you know the relationship is pretty much over, you just don’t want it to be? When you think that maybe if you don’t say it out loud that the relationships just isn't working anymore maybe it will just fix itself because love conquers all? Yeah? No? Am I talking to nobody? 

YES, yes I am.

SO me and Link talk for like an hour and I have that feeling, I'm giving him tons of opportunities to break up with me. Hes not taking any of them. No "Balls" on that boy I swear.

We are now at 12:30 AM on Thursday.

I cry for a bit and talk to my BFF Marlee, and then she goes to bed.

It's 1:30 AM and I still can't sleep.

I go downstairs with my pillow, blanket, and tears and decide to watch some TV at 1:30 in 

the morning. There is nothing good on TV at 1:30 in the morning.

I cry a lot… blah blah blah

It is now 3 AM and I'm still nowhere close to being able to sleep. SO I call my mum. At 3 AM, and to my surprise, she answers. I talk with her and cry and talk and cry more then finally in between all the crying, she convinces me that, basically, I need to break up with HIM. I have to do this because he won't do it to me and I know that. So the little bastard forced me to break up with him while I was still 100% in love with him. That hurt the most I think.

So then I broke up with him over text.

Insensitive I know, but he didn't really deserve a "nice" or "courteous" dumping at this point.

And then I cried some more and went and got my dad and he almost started crying with me 

and we talked and I cried some more and I think we watched Family Feud there on that couch on that horrid morning at 5 AM and in fact, in that moment, I had never felt more loved.

SOO.. that is that

EXTRA! EXTRA! READ ALL ABOUT IT!!!

The time has come. My blog is almost a year old, and I'm no further with it… Great. I started this thing LAST year on February 5th. So, in celebration of it turning a year old, I am going to try my very hardest to post something every day until February 5th. TRY being the operative word here.

Today's post is on what else? BUT a stupid guy. Again. *sighs*

Okay so hopefully you, my one dedicate fan, knows that Link recently broke up with me. My heart shattered into a million pieces… I didn’t think I could go on… I just wanted him back.. BLAH BLAH BLAH

Yeah, so I'm officially over him (woot woot) because according to my sources (my cousin) he has been talking trash about me and how I "run" a relationship. Making false allegations against me, and basically trying to make himself to seem like the injured one out of the whole situation. Normal ex-boyfriend stuff.

*RANDOM RANT* When he (Link) broke up with me, he said he wanted to, and I quote, "I just need to try the single life for a while, you know, have some time to myself. I'm really stressed with school and stuff right now" FIRST thing I have to say about this phrase is that it and everything it could possibly mean is absolutely R.I.D.I.C.U.L.O.U.S SECOND is that since saying this to me, I have exclusive Intel that Link has hypnotized another girl with those big brown eyes of his into completely falling for him, only to be dumped on her butt in the future. Good luck sweetie.

 AND now that my theoretical "ship of emotions" has "sailed" on him, I can dock at a new port (move on).

So, I have.

I like another human of the male species, and I do not like it one bit. BUT as usual, my brain has other plans and is making me completely fall  for him. Which is just peachy.

SO I may have forgotten why "they" (general populous of people) call "them" (feelings toward someone else) a CRUSH. It's because having a crush on someone will literally crush you if you do not know how to handle them. Crushes are very wild, animal, untamed things and should not be tampered with or else they will become aggravated.

A Crush, or Crushifacanus emotionuus (made up Latin name for a crush) is a thing that affects usually humans within the 11-19 year old age range. The Crush has become famous for its often unprovoked hunting style. The Crush sneaks up on its prey and within just 4 minutes of the attack, the Crush has taken control of the prey completely. The Crush has no specific prey. Some ways to know if you have been attacked by a crush are Inability to speak/ Stuttering, Tripping over your own feet at the most inconvenient of times, Heartbeat felling like it's going a 100,000,000,000 miles per second, Obsessive looking in the mirror, Someone becoming insanely attractive to nobody but you all of a sudden and Random over-analysis of texts.

If you suspect you may have been attacked by the ever elusive and extremely aggressive Crush, comment on this post immediately.